But the USGA rule book says nothing about weddings. Weddings? That’s right, weddings. What if you’re walking up the 18th fairway at Moore’s Mill Golf Club and realize a large, high-society wedding is happening just yards away from the green? You know, one of those fancy ones with violins, tuxedos and a preacher. Groomsmen wore black, while the bridesmaids wore green dresses with pink. But why am I talking about that?

And there I was, a hundred yards away in sweaty shorts and hat. Not exactly wedding attire. I would have worn a green and pink dress if it had helped my score.

I faced a dilemma. Do I go for the green, because that’s what I’m supposed to do? Or do I stand here and wait for the ceremony to conclude, knowing full well that anything I hit will not come anywhere near the desired target?

I can see it now, the bride and groom, who I’m told is spending the honeymoon in the Turks and Caicos Islands, are exchanging vows, and from the distance, an idiot in a bright red shirt is yelling, “Fore!” Everyone duck and cover. Joe’s misguided Top Flite is about to separate this couple before they tie the knot. Pre-wedding jitters focused on the threat of rain. Except now, the forecast called for a mild threat of hail stone-sized golf balls.

My playing partner, political afficionado and part-time Annika Sorenstam Jennifer Foster, recommended I wait until the wedding was over. We wouldn’t want to interrupt the blessed event. She was right, I guess. But I couldn’t have hit the wedding if I tried. The bad thing is I wouldn’t have tried—thus, increasing the chances for a nuptial bogey.

Then the preacher said something like: I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Robert Randolph Ruddy IV, you may kiss your bride.

Good. I may hit my golf ball. I’m not going to tell you where it went.

You ask, “Well, why didn’t you turn the blinkers on?

I didn’t want to drive around with the blinker on and not turn. Then I’d look like an idiot.

Instead, I peered through the glass the best I could and tried not to hit any other vehicles or telephone poles on the way home. I took the picture above while driving. Is that against the law? That was my view. Pretty stupid, huh? I’ll try not to do that again and I don’t recommend it.

Part of a long walk I took through a few Auburn neighborhoods included a path through Auburn Memorial Park Cemetery. I veered off the main path to walk among the grave markers, just checking out a few names. Then one name caught my eye.

James Ralph Jordan.

Is that? No. Yes? The most celebrated coach in Auburn football history is laid to rest right here. I didn’t realize a grave of someone so legendary would be no different than anyone else in a cemetery. I guess I figured he’d have something elaborate. Then I thought about it. No, Shug, as folks call him, didn’t want all the glamour and attention. He was a man just like anyone else.

I always respected coach Jordan, though I never met nor saw him. Heard some great things about him. After seeing his modest grave marker, I respect him even more.

* Anything around TigerTown: Lots of roads here. There’s Gateway and Frederick, Gateway and TigerTown, Gateway and Enterprise, etc. TigerTown is a center of commerce, which obviously creates traffic—in many different directions.

* I-85 entrance ramp from U.S. 280/431: Cars/trucks gotta merge with high-speed traffic. Now here’s a recipe for disaster.

* Veterans Parkway or Grand National Parkway and U.S. 280: Good thing there are red lights here now. Still, 280 is a high-speed situation, which lends itself to the potential for bad accidents.

* Gateway Drive (280) and Pepperell Parkway: High traffic volume, often slow, but most dangerous aspect is people rushing to beat red lights.

* South Long Street and Frederick Road: No stop signs on South Long Street, while motorists on Frederick Road often turn onto South Long. The chance for a driver to pull out in front of another is high.

I’m sure there are others, probably a few I didn’t think about.

Word has it that ribbons are also being placed on Opelika city hall. There may be purple ribbons elsewhere across the county, but I haven’t noticed them.

The Relay for Life is an event that helps raise funds in the fight against cancer. The event begins at 6 p.m. Friday and lasts through 6 a.m. Saturday.

For more information about Relay for Life, email Robbi Beauchamp at robbi.beauchamp@eamc.org or call (334) 742-0011

Then I began to think (scary, huh?) ... what are the most dangerous intersections in the area? Tonight I’ll try to come up with Auburn’s five-most dangerous. Tomorrow, it’s Opelika’s turn.

Without further adieu and in no particular order, here are what I believe (with no statistical data other than driving experience) are the five-most dangerous intersections in Auburn:

* East University and Opelika Road: The mall and Flint’s crossing generate crowds to an extent, but these are major arteries coming together. The speed limit is 45 mph, so that doesn’t help. Bumper-to-bumper congestion can also create a low-mileage fender-bender or two if folks aren’t paying attention waiting for a green light, not that these minor dents will result in broken necks.

* Magnolia and South College: When you mix lots of cars and lots of people, you get a recipe for potential bad things. It’s a good thing electronic crosswalks are installed. But that doesn’t mean folks use their brains all of the time.

* South College and East University: Two main roads, once again. At 5 o’clock, it’s crowded and people want to get home.

* North College or Donahue and Shug Jordan: This may be a stretch, but North College and Donahue’s intersections on the loop road are pretty much the same—high speed. If there’s an accident, it’s got a good chance at being a bad one.

* Glenn and Gay: Speed limits aren’t high, but congestion can be in this area close to Auburn’s downtown. I wouldn’t think a Life Flight helicopter is in order for anything at this intersection, but it might help keep a few body shops in business.

I’m sure there are others, but these came off the top of my head. What do you think, and what can be done to remedy the problem?

In the jury pool, you are asked to provide a number of facts about yourself, including your job, military service, etc. Since I worked at the newspaper, I figured I’d be shown the door rather early, but I wasn’t.

Here are a few things I learned about the jury and court:

* Chairs in the small jury room are the most comfortable I’ve ever sat in. They’re leather and they swivel. If I were selected, I’d want to deliberate in that room all day. I’d like to take one home. Good to see the county’s taxpayers are providing the jury with excellent comfort.

* Chairs in the courtroom are not comfortable. Maybe it’s just me. Maybe I don’t like to sit in one place for more than 15 minutes.

* I lost my green jury identification number badge the other day. We don’t have names, just numbers. By Thursday morning, it was recovered. Must have left it on the witness stand or something.

* New magazines are necessary in the larger jury pool waiting room. There’s only so much Martha Stewart Home and Southern Living this guy can handle. I need some football. At least I’ve learned new ways to make casseroles, and how to arrange flowers for a more welcoming living room.

* Many cases reach plea bargains before the jury is selected and court begins. That’s good. We get to go home early.

* Being in the jury pool isn’t bad work for $10 per day. At jury duty, I never developed carpal tunnel syndrome and I never got blisters.

If Miley wants to start getting naked for the camera, that’s her prerogative. But she’s such a role model for young girls, what kind of message is she sending? How many Disney stars, or former Disney stars, end up with controversy of a sexual nature? Sounds pretty goofy to me.

Regarding Miley’s camera-happy expose, does this break her daddy’s Achy Breaky Heart?

Below is a link to a story on the subject, with examples of the incidents.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/24350239#24350239

I spent the first part of the draft hoping the Jets would not land RB Darren McFadden. Thanks, Raiders. I spent the second part of the draft hoping my woeful Dolphins would fill their quarterback needs. It took them long enough, but they finally called Chad Henne’s name with the 57th pick.

After some first round speculations, I was somewhat surprised to see Auburn defensive end Quentin Groves not be chosen until the 52nd pick overall, halfway into the second round, by Jacksonville. Six defensive ends were taken before him, so I suppose Groves has an opportunity to prove some NFL scouts wrong.

Groves was the first of two Auburn players chosen Saturday. Green Bay selected Tiger cornerback Patrick Lee, who had a strong senior season, with the 60th pick overall. Lee will get plenty of chances to prove his worth against fellow Packer draftee, quarterback Brian Brohm.

Sunday, I’d expect Auburn defensive tackle Pat Sims to be the first Tiger drafted, possibly in the third round. Others that might be selected today include offensive lineman King Dunlap, fullback Carl Stewart, defensive back Jonathan Wilhite, defensive back Eric Brock and tight end Cole Bennett. Auburn has a long history of proven fullbacks in the NFL (Tony Richardson, Heath Evans, Harold Morrow, Fred Beasley, William Andrews, to name a few), so you’d think Stewart, who has excellent hands, could be given a look.

Wallace Avenue is pretty, with nice little homes decorated with flags and yards blooming with azaleas and dogwoods. Friday, bullet shells joined the decorations. I’ll still drive that road because I like the scenery. I feel bad for the good residents who live there knowing that some may tag the subdivision as dangerous. Maybe it is. Maybe it isn’t. It’s still a good shortcut.